Get all 23 rap legend Jesse Dangerously releases available on Bandcamp and save 90%.
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2. |
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A Single Gay Male On His Thirtieth Birthday
(1.Doubt 2.Lonely 3.Nightmare)
Jesse Dangerously
Origami
[Doubt]
Just another day on the calendar, yesh yesh
Y'all, up in the club, wearing my lavender mesh vest
Sat down next to this kid, a hung youngster
Wearing a t-shirt that said "Cum Dumpster"
I took him home, being something of a muddyfunster
And we did the monster mash, like the Munsters
It wasn't no Thing, but boy did I Lurch
When he got up in the morning, got dressed, and went to church
Just the night before he'd offered me his ass to breach
And now he had a mass to preach and a class to teach?
Damn, he's a minister - he kicks it Jesus Christ style
Now I feel like he must be judging me and my life style
For real though, a minister, I wonder what the reason is?
Where have all the cowboys gone? The drag queens and hedonists?
Come to think of it, I can hardly even remember
The last time I wore fetish gear even as late as September
Shit, am I getting old? My abs have started to soften
I'd better get down to the YMCA more often
These days I use caution, I used to be reckless
I had it eight times a week and had a straight boy checklist
Used to have coffee and sausage for breakfast, best of all
I never had a moment of concern for words like cholesterol
Testosterone was my chemical of choice, I was high on lust
Iron cock and balls, but I suppose even iron rusts
But hey, let's not go nuts, I still look damn good
And still haven't got any doubt as to my manhood
I'm down to like put it in the place where you sit on
I'm going downtown tonight and I better get hit on
[Lonely]
Home alone again, twenty nine years and threehundredsixtyfour days
After my birth... I need another lite beer
I like my life right here, your average white queer
But looking back at my childhood, it seems like lightyears
Ostracized by my peers in school, glad that's behind me
But will anyone think I'm beautiful when I'm ninety?
Not to put it too finely, I've been so concerned with getting cuter
That I've never made any kind of plans for the future
Never learned about computers or long term investments
Blithely living hand to mouth, avoiding the big questions
Felt like I was destined to remain a swinging bachelor
But these one night stands are starting to leave me empty
I want to call my mom but she seems so uncomfortable
She never really thought my lifestyle choice was wonderful
Under all the hurt, though, I know she still cares about
Her baby boy's overall conditions and whereabouts
I should call her, it's been two years or thereabouts
'Cause last time I was so hurt when she got up in my hair about
Wasn't I over this yet? Time to be bland, average
And give her grandchildren - like what do I look like, Dan Savage?
I feel more like Buddy Cole and being a stereotype bothers me
But it's been a struggle to fit in where I go, like sodomy
Heh... it's getting late, I'm sobering up, time for beddy-bye
There'll be plenty of time for introspection when my thoughts are more steady
I know it's petty, but right now, it hurts me the worst way
To be a single gay male on his thirtieth birthday
[Nightmare]
(various samples of speeches given by Westboro Baptist Church pastor Fred Phelps, taken from their website in 1999 or 2000)
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3. |
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I make this music for
Fifteen children with damaged senses
Broken down social skills and defenses
I demand expensive vacations and adventures
Saving time with a technique that shampoos and conditions
Transmissions via arcane hand positions
I'm like the Pansy Division of the No Limit Army
An eight digit code identifies me as non-partisan
Friendly enough but essentially a solo-artisan
My style is hard, as in extremely difficult to master
I developed it in the Bassment of Critical, the bastard
Son of convention and dissention, a confusing developmental
Proccess, at once inventing and fusing elemental concepts
not buying into it, but renting an illusion, paying dues
To no-one, refused to stay amused and now I play the blues
Rave reviews and critical pans, shaping views, political stance
Ambiguous, brilliance swathed in ignorance
Unseen Sentinel, akin to Will'O'The Wisp yet ever-vigilant
I don't exactly lisp but I have trouble with my sybillants
Asthmatic jazz-addict, hard consonants and pop filters
Influences on my sleeve, yet somewhat off-kilter
Not guilty, the air in this room is hot and filthy
If you're feeling it, then deal with it, if not, then kill me
All silly bugger-ups and zero gravity aside
Analysis determined that your rhyme had to be a lie
Realize, recognition can't touch my total recall
Of events, you're offensive and you're not my vocal equal
Of ALL people, MCs should be attentive and alert and
Never gainsay Jesse Dangerously, that's for certain
You're a picture of health and I'm hurting for a fix
Literate person, Levar Burton lyricist
Impossible like pyramids, incorrigible like children
Futuristic throwback, at once deplorable and brilliant
Adorable chameleon with no fixed abode and
Wearing water wings because the coast is eroding
Holding forth on a variety of matters
Kicking it ambiguous because my ideas are scattered
Confused from the way I've been battered and bruised
Commercial artists seem even sadder in hues of purple
I never meant to edify, I figured that instead if I
Founded a City Of Truth that it would be idiot-proof
The video proves every item in my testimony's legit
Better than veterans, but I guess I'm only a kid
In your opinion. when I'm wack, it's not an accident
Rattle castanets, job one is being passionate
Precise and purposeful, pursue props with perseverance
Sometimes it feels like def delivery's my only prayer for deliverance
Belligerance is second nature, eyedroppers of echinacea
Public Remedy number one is lots of decorations
For the shoppers when they're chasing that elusive self esteem
Brand X, Flavour Flav, Gargamel, Scooby Doo and He-Man
..I'll be seen and heard henceforth
'cause I'll remain behind when the last bird heads north
Enthralled in the art, I won't even know if it's winter yet
I'm so glad I met certain people on the internet
It must have been kismet, 'cause I was a fan to begin with
It's a fantasy, given this chance to be in this man's business
The princess and the pea, is this misanthropy?
I've got the good juice, foot loose and fancy free
Emancipated from a room that's oppressively warm
With my shirt off and underwear suggestively torn
I've been thinking that it might be best if we warned
As many people as we can before we aggressively swarm
The corporate installments in the capital city
I'm sick of this contemporary rap, it's all shitty
And that sentiment brings me to the completion of this steeplechase, so just
Swallow for now, and hear what the people say
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4. |
Childish Fantasy
03:19
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One day, I'm going to be raised up in glory - famous.
I'll attend the Grammies with my good friends Jewel and Tori Amos
I'll talk to everyone, I'll barely pause from my first breath
Except to frown at Courtney Love, because I blame her for Kurt's death
And Shania Twain will walk up to me, wearing a buckskin vest
And confide to me, privately, that she's been much impressed
By everything she's heard from me, and would I like date her?
And I'll reply "You'd like Melissa, I'll introduce the two of you later"
Then, leaving the girls to talk amongst one another, I'll advance
To a clear space in the lobby, and stop a while to dance
Only to be interrupted by Tom Waits and Leonard Cohen, seeking autographs
And some fool says "look, it's John Lennon" - yeah, I get a lot of that
Later I'll rush to my seat, without a lot of slack to take up since
I'd cornered Brian Warner for half an hour to swap make-up hints
And although a nominee and a performer, I'll also be a presenter
Since a name like mine creates a draw and they like me front and center
And I'll eschew the teleprompter's canned and corny, played and trite shit
To flirt with my copresenter and the audience warmly, displaying my speed-of-light wit
And everyone will like it, I'll be the darling of every tabloid
Since they saw me through the libel case I was hit with from Bad Boy
I'll make the worst dressed pages, still, but I won't let it get to me
I'll just console myself with yet another cosmetic tonsilectomy
Body modifications? You bet your life, now listen here
Talk about liposuction, I swear to God I'll damn near disappear!
Callista Flockhart and Fiona Apple will express concern for my health
But we'll talk and they'll both agree I've got to learn for myself.
Understand this-I'll be the planet rocker, having dragged myself to the top of the heap the hard way
And I'll finally get to see my own production of JesusChristSuperstar on Broadway
Shebang X action figures, lunch boxes and an animated, feature length
Biography, an internationally franchised Jesse's Own pizza chain
An odessy of celebrity, stand up comedians will target me
Bumble bees will make honey just for me 'til it's hard to be humble
Gee, I can't wait for this to come about, I'm ready when the world is
Take me now, please, I'm ready... I wanna be a STAR
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5. |
Mortally Coiled Snake
02:39
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These lemonade drinking renegades thinking they can
Get away with sinking ships, these hypocrites seen better days
Animals, criminals, little kids, chemicals
Snips, snails, fishermen's tales & squids' tentacles
Sensibility and sense, prejudice and pride. Nice
Guys finish last with a side of chicken fried rice
I got sick and died twice, Resurrection Brothers take
Care of me, I spoke out in class today like Jeremy
Let them eat cake while I break beats
I'm getting over my weak state, but it could take weeks
To fully regenerate the blood and limbs lost
in the struggle. (Will you make it?) Well that depends, boss,
On whether or not you're willing to make a sacrifice
If you decline, it's alright 'cause I'm gonna ask you twice
In fact, I'm a persist until it's settled, one way or the other
Check the time on my wrist, it's Sunday, word to mother
I'm a karma karma karma karma karma chameleon
With the arm leg leg arm head fire alarm alien
I be the Tom Sawyer with the sneaky labor force delegation
And I'm working on improving my caber toss elevation
Meteors strike out of an orange-colored sky
With space junk as I hum a funk lullabye
Are we not men who eat boiled owls?
Or are we astro-men...?
Faces adorned with royal scowls and common courtesy
Is lost now that everyone and their mama's heard of me
You can't stay calm observing me, my antics are absurd
And if I'm frightened, I become frantic and disturbed
And when I'm writing rhymes like this, I get raised hair and
Shivers and I lose my common sense and run with a pair of scissors
Terrorists are not allowed beyond the time alotted
Or you could wind up wearing a fishing line, garotted
If not blown to bits, they've been known to mix
Cocktails of the Molotov sort, carrying shotguns
They sawed them off short. It's a BAD DEAL
When you've got fake people saying "shit is mad real"
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6. |
For Lack of Trying
04:28
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chorus:
|:I'm getting stupid like I was in school in reverse
Wasted time, I was never cool in the first place and:|
Time fills my hands completely, weighing 'em down
I'm like a turtle on my back, laying around
I can't get up, I haven't got the drive at all
Life moves faster than I do, I can't survive it all
I'm no longer certain I was right to eschew college
Maybe I'd be happier if I worked to pursue knowledge
Maybe I'd have a job by now if I wasn't so frightened
Maybe it's about time I got my driver's license
A blank sheet is my resume, I can't apply myself
To anything but music, I spend days by myself
Surrounded by speakers that I didn't achieve on my own
Sometimes you might almost believe I'm alone
Except that I'd be dead and gone without so much as
A ripple without my most valuable crutches
My family and friends keep me alive in many ways
But I'm still not much good and I don't like myself anyway
[chorus]
I never endeavor, but it's not for lack of trying
For ever and ever, my eyes are black from crying
I want to sail away from myself and my bruised emotions
Visit alternative shores and cruise the oceans
I can't face eternity starting from the Grace Maternity
Hospital, I can't face mortality cause it's impossible
I sometimes dream that I'm attractive and clever instead of boring
But then reality snaps me out of my neverending story
I'm not atreyu the warrior, I'm not even bastian bux
Living in this world of unrequited passion sucks
I find myself bothering with every little thing or
Nothing while giving the important stuff the middle finger
[chorus]
I'm opposing forces, myself and I have to fight
I represent me, I've got my back tonight
Know what I'm saying? It's not exactly reassuring
My mutual annihilation is practically a sure thing
It's the one self duel and I'm caught in the crossfire
The troops have all deserted and the battle is lost. Higher
Powers protect my existance even while mocking it
Do I feel like this or am I depressed and talking shit?
Jesse standing Dangerously close to the edge
Hoping that I know the ledge. I ride a raincloud
To the sun... I wish I could touch the sky
Scared to die but I want so much to fly....
But I see too much disorder in the rorschach design
Of my life so I'm stuck to the earth for lack of trying
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7. |
Wicca Puffer
05:58
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8. |
Ten Westphal
02:35
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I saw you wearing a purple gem, I think it was amethyst
And in your Hollywood shades you look very glamorous
I'm apple-cinnamon... Abyssinian, fake
I'm crazy and spinning in Casey & Finnegan's wake
Admit that it's over, and time to begin again
I'm wearing my street clothes, but still going swimming in
The pool where the challenge is to wrestle with the undertow
That's forty-nine MCs down - fifty-one to go!
And I'm running out of breath, I'm coming stranger this time
I'm out of school, but I'm still Jesse Dangerous Minds
I've got the Substitute rhymes, don't talk on 187
One man's hell could be one lady's heaven
I rock philosophical, cosmopolitan
Hyperbole, cock and bull... sometimes I'm falling in
The categories I've categorically railed against
How can I be so happy and simultaneously filled with angst?
I'm holding something back, something intangible
I can almost feel it, but my quest seems unanswerable
Explain to me, make it clear to me, say a word to me
Stay with me, show your face to me, give me surgery
Be my friend, hold my right hand, hold my left hand
Hug me, save me from myself and save me from the next man
Tell me I'll be all right, tell me I'll be safe
Hold me close to earth 'cause I'm afraid of outer space
And now the race seems to favor Energizer bunnies
Slow and steady wins a second wind and thicker skin
Please God, let me keep my pain as a memento
But save me from the centre of the olive, with no pimento
I'll try to keep an open mental, here's looking at you
And seeing my reflection in a broken window
YESH YESH Y'ALL
TEN WESTPHAL
YESH YESH Y'ALL
AND IT'S A COLD PLACE
YESH YESH Y'ALL
TEN WESTPHAL
I POUR MY HEART INTO MY BRAIN
AND SPIT MY BRAIN INTO YOUR FACE
hold me love me
kiss me hug me
fuck me save me
save me save me
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9. |
Spring Garden
04:28
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10. |
Cinqo De Mayo
03:11
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You maintained a claim that you were dope but where's the evidence at?
I keep my credentials safe underneath this medicine hat
Bakayaro, you'll drop like a ton of bricks, drink
Tea of the rose hips and today the sun's eclipsed
Once terrific, persona-non-grata
Self-propelled, dead in the water
Connection made, send and recieve
Carrier dropped, bend and retrieve
Never meant to believe, incredulous
Unable to grasp what's been said to us
Lazarus project, resurrected in Nazareth
Call me mister synonym for hazardous
Gather us together, transport in cattle cars
We'll write our names on one another in battle scars
..Out for the fame, recognition
Advance Dungeons and Dragons, second edition
Wrecking magicians, hunting bakuretsu
Fronting hard like no attack will get through
Said to be invincible, or at least a bad ass
Focus on the family, word to Natas Kaupas
Show us courtesy, give us our daily dose
Lunatic P, Neptune and Helios
Mares eat oats, but Ginzu3 already told you that
And went on to twist it into a vulgar rap
Holler at me, pigeons and scrubs alike
Make your own de-cisions, for the love of mike
Suffer the slings and arrows of fate
Outrageously close, a narrow escape
There I was, nape of my neck exposed
To vampires, and had to wait for the next episode
Same bat time and bat channel, guys
Rock it in five and find yourself analyzed
(George Carlin: Occupation Foole; "He's good, God damn!")
Once terrific, persona-non-grata
Self propelled, dead in the water
Connection made, send and receive
Carrier dropped, bend and retreive
Never meant to decieve, unfortunate
Tugging at my sleeve, importunate
Quit forcing it, let it flow
You heard it but don't get it, though
Partisan politics, different ball of wax
Wait until you've got all the facts straight
Master Ace, a walk in the valley
Eighty-Eight, rocking the Ballys
Kangol, Cazals, Adidas
Visited our private hells and freed us
Off of the pointed stick into the campfire
The Rebels can be as bad as the Empire
Strike that iron while it's hot and malleable
My philosophy is not infallible
Animal . impulses
The robot . convulses
Thin skull syndrome, not strong
A prisoner in your own dot com
Listener, you've fought long for this
But tell me it's not ominous that
Things are starting to fall into place
I assembled the great pyramid from Kinder Eggs
Win the race to lose your ego and your
House was built by Ivo Shandor
(4/4)
Candour reigns mainly on the plains of fascination
Premature emasculation from the strains of adulation
Trust exaggeration, I think I may have lost you with
Invisible kissable huggable squeezable lovable feasible postulates
Lost your wits? Please don't hesitate
To borrow mine along a straight and narrow line
Oh Carolina, raas bumba claat
Espousing misogyny cause your tongue to rot
Understand son, you're not equipped
In this neighborhood, run your hockey stick
Three fingers sticky from the honey pot
Get ready, here it goes - that's the money shot
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11. |
Message From Moves
01:11
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12. |
Trouble Brewing (1979)
03:14
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Unpopular, unprecedented, unparalleled
Undestructible, supersonic carousel
Unorthodox, unusual anarchist, the
Sex educator and I don't smoke cannabis
No manifesto will escape unmolested
My oral cavity is electric like Uncle Fester's
I spit sparks and I'm shocking when I'm talking
I'm cooler than a meat locker, the lord chief rocker
Number one king of nine zero two. MCs quake
In sock feet and get eaten like cheesecake
Over rock beats and jazz breaks, country music
Big band swing songs, and you can call me King Kong
Jimmy Ray sucks, the only way of stopping him
Is carrying him up to the top floor and dropping him
Suckers can't deal, they run and get their pistols
To pop Sixteen, but haven't got the wherewithal
Cor blimey, none of you slimey salamanders
Could last one round with the Great Alexander
I'm building libraries and burning college dorms
Trouble's on its way in knowledge form
nineteen seventy-nine
It's trouble brewing
I can smell the fear of the suckers a mile away
Banks are criminals, just smile and say thanks
For the memories, scars and trauma
Terror on the mix, microphone carbomber
Gimme a stage and you can trust me to lose it
With a different definition of industrial music
..Going nuts on a hot fudge sundae
Runway models and I don't like gunplay
..Bumba claat, Bangladesh, breaker one nine
Demolition derby, everything breaks sometimes
Cairo to Budapest, put me to the test, clock
This marathon, I don't even need a rest stop
Pissed off, powerful, suckers are panicking
Petrified, posed in a position like a mannequin
I'm a fanatic and a total nutcase to boot
MCs, time to face the truth!
You're fashioned in a factory, forgotten in fifteen
Minutes. I've seen the future, you're not in it.
I'm taking over using break beats, rock and roll
Rhymes unlimited and primitive thought control
I time travel and skewer the wack with a rhyme
Javelin... if you were to practise
You'd have a much higher chance of surviving
Than you would with those foolhardy plans you're devising
Scan the horizon, looking for escape, getting
Anxious to be out of the way, like Cape Breton
You expect the storm at any minute
It's trouble brewing
Nineteen seventy-nine I appeared in a flash of light
Now I'm headed for the afterlife
I've got things to do, facts to face, wax in crates to lacerate
(problems to exacerbate, I must amass the breaks)
At faster rates so backs will break and all of that's at stake
This could be my only chance, but I refuse it, I'll
Never leave the planet while I'm still highly musical
Bring it on, break it down, beat me to a pulp in the
Pavement, Word to adult entertainment!
Skulls been arranged in position for my drum kit
And I'm a pacifist, now ain't . that . some . shit?
Rhymes and beats unfit'll get better profits
Scavenging for lyrics at the dead letter office
Electro-encephallographic novelty shops
I could be the next big thing, but probably not
Bad moon rising, negative omens and hanged necks
No way of knowing Shebang X
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13. |
Abominated Pig-Men
03:17
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Sweet Venus... on clear autumn nights like this one...
I can imagine my own
Personal constellation, it looks just like her and tempts me
I'm not a player-hater, I'm a player-disliker-intensely
Incidentally, a hell of an MC with a penchant for manly hubris
Recommended by four out of five licentious Stanley Kubricks
Rude and difficult like Rubik's Cube, shy of a load by a few bricks
Known to recite children's verse in bus shelters at night just for the acoustics
Gentlemen, grab your gluesticks! I'll make every man-jack of your crew sick
With my bebop/rocksteady/Brahms' Lullabye/funeral music!
I want my face on the crucifix, I want my name in the papers
The glory and pride of my country, the private shame of the Quakers
Amish Paradise Lost in the Superbowl Shuffle of a stacked deck
I beat the written word into oblivion until little remains but a black speck
Mack Truck! I'm nothing but a float in the motorcade
Sick fuck! On speaking terms with several girls under voter-age
Slow to rage, early to bed, cautious but never chicken
Running figure-eights and perfect circles around the clever dickens!
Nine eyes on the clock that's ever tickin' towards the Rapture
I'll remain an upper echelon Pokémon - hard to capture!
At the first hint of disaster, the sucker turned white as a sheet!
"And we sent him cry-y-ing down the street!"
Punk rock passionate, anti-taxidermy activist
Devil's advocate, technically excellent rebel strategist
Satyriatic satirist, catastrophic catalyst
Cacophonic cat person, captain of the Nautilus
..I oughta bottle this rap fluid and hawk it to the
Girlies on the left who's gonna rock it to the early morn
In fresh mode, yesh y'all, pops filtered with pantyhose
If I was a gangster rapper I'd represent my colours in ANSI codes
. Strike a nasty pose and make a clever retort
To a dis record that sampled Björk or Weather Report
I would never resort to underhanded principles
When I could stand tall in my hidden fortress wonderland, invincible
The mission be damned, it's only sensible to listen
And learn, even presented with an indefensible position
Your fanciful suspicions have me branded with a pentacle
Well BIG DEAL, so what if I was? I'm a Sentinel!
Tentacle . PORN reborn, my resurrection was fraternal
I live up to the hype, unlike Reflection Eternal
Two kernels of advice: first, I recommend walking for your health
Second, girls - let your fingers do the talking to yourself
Wearing moccasins for stealth, sucker was still indiscrete
Take notes on this one, kids, 'cause I'm the baddest nimble
Linguist who still considers multisyllabic rhymes a status symbol
English is my theme park, I'm the carney at the tilt-a-whirl
Regrettably, so vicious like Milton Berle celebrity roasting
I'm replacing Emily Post and Lucy Maud Montgomery officially
It's not amiss to construe this as a summary dismissal, G
Misery . full in effect, I remember when
It was still okay to call rappers wack and then dismember them
How are you, gentlemen? Step in the camper van!
The greatest minds of our time were connected with ampersands!
But that's about to change because I swear I'm the best since
DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince!
Take it off, you can't see me in infrared
Making light of your injuries, taking a bite of the gingerbread
House, moving gingerly out amongst the people, right?
With two in the chest, just doing my best to smile and be polite
Evil like cute kittens. It's so regrettable
That you seem to feel that my rhymes are edible
A blessing to the medical profession, rhyming nonetheless
I'm out - I think you'll want to take some time and convalesce.
Sleep now!
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14. |
Jesse Ventura
03:08
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15. |
Adormecido No Sol
04:34
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16. |
Radioactivated
01:17
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17. |
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There's antimony arsenic aluminum selenium,
And hydrogen and oxygen and nitrogen and rhenium,
And nickel neodymium neptunium germanium,
And iron americium ruthenium uranium.
Europium zirconium lutetium vanadium,
And lanthanum and osmium and astatine and radium,
And gold protactinium and indium and gallium,
And iodine and thorium and thulium and thallium.
There's yttrium ytterbium actinium rubidium,
And boron gadolinium niobium iridium,
There's strontium and silicon and silver and samarium,
And bismuth bromine lithium beryllium and barium.
There's holmium and helium and hafnium and erbium,
And phosphorus and francium and fluorine and terbium,
And manganese and mercury, molybdenum magnesium,
Dysprosium and scandium and cerium and cesium.
And lead praseodymium and platinum plutonium
Palladium promethium potassium polonium,
And tantalum technetium titanium tellurium,
And cadmium and calcium and chromium and curium.
There's sulfur, californium and fermium, berkelium,
And also mendelevium einsteinium nobelium,
And argon krypton neon radon xenon zinc and rhodium,
And chlorine carbon cobalt copper tungsten tin and sodium.
These are the only ones of which the news has come to Harvard,
And there may be many others but they haven't been discovered.
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18. |
Otherworldly
02:24
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Time stands still and, looking around, you're not certain what is
Real. You're sick of people trying to tell you how to feel
About the green stars, blue clovers, but of course you
Can't quite figure out the miniature yellow horseshoes
Clandestine transactions in the dark corners distract you from
The risk at hand and soon you're getting sucked up in the vaccuum
You hacked through some foliage and found a treasure chest
Of sample loops, organised in groups that sound together best
You started walking through this middle earth and soon a little Smurf
Approached with nervousness and offered you some goods and services
You asked to see his wares and he produced a brew of mandrake
Peanut butter pancakes and tickets to a clambake,
After you examined them, he spoke and said "Hey man, take
The whole shebang for five cents" and offered you a handshake
You looked the gift horse directly in the kisser
Sniffed and sighed, thought a while, and tried not to smile
When you realized that this wasn't just a bargain too
Good to believe, he was grossly undercharging you
Your conscience made you say "no thanks" and offer the advice
That he should think twice before lowering the price to where
It's ridiculous. He thought about it, chewing on some licorice
And asked if you were ticklish.
Then the sky inverted colors and you lost your concentration
You forgot your father's birthday and your locker combination
Then all of a sudden, you knew that you were on a mission
That would take time and effort and a grasp of long division
So you sang a song that didn't have a tune or any lyrics
And you banged a gong that summoned four and twenty friendly spirits
Their auras were blue and light purple, they flew in tight circles
And spoke in irritating whiney voices like Urkel
They left you with your pockets and your cavities filled
And a complete collection of tapes by Björk and Gravity Kills
And the deed to a house in some place called Amityville
And then you seemed to wake up, but you didn't really wake up
You just dreamed that you woke up, you didn't really wake up
But you brushed your teeth and hair and did your make up. And then
Somebody spoke and you went into a dream but at this point it
Only served to make you that much more disjointed
Suddenly you were flying due to awe inspiring forces
And you looked down in mirth at metal roads for iron horses
And started laughing at it all, the heartless mathematical
Godforsaken world, and then you saw a naked girl
And then you woke up for real this time.
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19. |
Underground Astrology
04:08
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Give it to me straight, without the runaround apology
I couldn't wait for the underground astrology
..It's funny, floating weightless in a cavern
Beneath the Earth's surface, fulfilling man's first purpose
Weathering your worst curses, spitballs and spiteful glares
Turnaround is fairplay, and Phats is the rightful heir
I'm set to make it known, I don't intend to take the throne
I'm not down with breaking bones, play it that way, I'm staying home
I'm just a girl in the world, so don't give me any shit
I'm giving back, being wack has benefits
So you're selling crack and giving all the proceeds to charity?
That's not just dichotomy, that's downright disparity
Hypocrisy, but who am I to criticize when I myself
May not peddle addiction, but nor do I share the wealth
I see the stars in the sky, we work in the game plan
Covet the cars and the fly t-shirt with the name brand
It's insane, man, and when the powers frown on your luck
You don't get down off your horse, you just get down off a duck
And paint your toenails red to hide in cherry trees
Who says this doornail's dead? Don't try to bury me!
I may be sheltered by the bedrock above but don't
Stab me in the ventricle and then talk of love BITCH
If the glove fits, you've found your prey, it's time for
Calling off the dogs and nothing's easier than falling off a log.
Give it to me crooked, I hope I never comprehend
I've gone beyond the end of my tether, talk about the weather
Is it gonna rain blood? Has the black sun's heat been waning?
Say something positive, you don't have to keep complaining
Give it a rest, give me a break, give me a hug
Bundle up and don't catch that arhythmea bug
Can you see what has meaning, and what's nothing but rhetoric?
Arithmetic, I'm bound to catch my death of wreck, so hurl your
Epithets until you miss my shameless target
My older, younger sister's name is Margaret
Regardless of the position of my axis, I'm hard as love
Evidence of remission of my taxes, to God above
Dear God, I wonder can you step to me?
Since the virgin mary had a half-price hysterectomy
Lesson 3 clearly states that no man is an island
But a comment in the footnotes denotes that I'm a continent
Smiley face ascii in a dominant style, erase prominent figureheads
Method of birth control is cigarettes
Sharp pains accompany the rending of your ligaments
These gentlemen are figments of a cruelly twisted thought proccess
I've fought progress to the limits of endurance
Despair delivers us unto cynics and current affairs
Raise the premiums of life insurance. Beware
Quick fixes, unless the damage warrants repairs
...The path of poetry is tricky and rigorous
I circumvent obstacles by keeping it strictly ambiguous
While you're reaching for the top in a frantic scrabble
My head is wrapped in clouds of semantic babble
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20. |
Heterodoxy
03:57
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"I can't make another piece of art that glorified bloodshed, violence and brutality"
"What I need is someone like you, who likes to listen to a man like me!"
Hellllld captive like
Narcissus; living through gauntlets of artifice
Dauntless but I don't want this, I want no part of this
Action. Distraction, sleight of hand, magic
The world I want to live in is kind of fantastic
Unrealistic, perhaps, idealistic certainly
I need peace for me, I feel it with urgency
Even from my vantage point, I believe it pertinent
To express distaste for violence and punishments
Permanent improvements will never be achieved by treating symptoms
There are better methods than cruelty to avoid being victims
It's time for beating systems, instead of horse carcasses
None of us wants to admit what a powerful force darkness is
Inverted Narcissists, misunderstanding our affections
Unable to direct them towards our own reflections
Festering infections turn us against their symbiotic kin
Scared of our skins and so-called erotic sins
Nothing but neurotic robot slaves on the worst of days
Might as well go for a soda, much as it hurts to say
Complicating for simplicity's sake, with pullies and ropes
Mother, you children go to school to deal with bullies and dope
And that's the way it always has been, don't believe the
Retrospective hype, little good comes from memories of the selective type
I used to think that left was right, but now I think I see past it
And I'd rather move politically on the Y or Z axis
To be precise - I'm a pacifist, against bloodshed and wars and
While I'm pro-choice, I can't say I'm pro abortion
Pro liberty, pro fidelity and I support pornography
I don't believe in national identity - I am not geography
I completely support alternative and ambigous sexuality
But I don't believe in gay rights because law is not reality
No political body has the authority to determine the validity
Of your inner self, lifestyle, favoured fetish or proclivities
So stick to your activities - give a cry of "Fuck the man!" and fuck a man
It's better than a rainbow bumper sticker on your truck or van
In the end, all you need is your own damn self to qualify
There's no God to forgive you, but it can't hurt to apologise
But then again, what have you got to be found guilty of?
Vanity? Avarice? Cruelty? Or conventionally filthy love?
Nobody's perfect, all we can do is our personal best
And in the end, no individual is really worse than the next
Perversion is bliss, and ignorance an overrated attribute
Ask Knowself about the preoccupying need to pray to absolutes
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21. |
In Heav'n
02:03
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22. |
rap legend Jesse Dangerously Ottawa, Ontario
Genuine Independent Rap Legend (GIRL)
member of Backburner crew
half of Danger
Grove w Lizard Grove
half of The Library Steps w Ambeez & Illgil
one-third of Imaginary Friends w Thesis Sahib & MC Frank Deluxe
one-third of The Sentinels w ginzuintriplicate & Naked J
partially culpable for the nerdcore problem
... more
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